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Réfléchir & Croître

Black Friday. Cyber Monday. Christmas Shopping. Annual Evals.

Resolution Review…

Time to balance the books…


Time to balance the books. It’s a #WhatTheHeckMan audit. So what’s ha’nning?

The end of the year often brings about reflection. Unwanted or preplanned, you find folks taking the time out to recollect and recount the year that has just gone by.
We find boxes to put things in.
Think of it like sorting through a giant box of undated photographs and trying to create albums that you then stuff under your bed or away in the hallway closet.

So here I am reflecting on what the year brought along with it.

Light It Up!

March 6th, 2016.
I remember sitting that evening by the water fountain and repeatedly saying

“The Devil is a liar”

I had a fantastic day that day before that moment. I gave a testimony at church, led worship and felt very lifted to be honest.
The Friday before that, I had gotten a promotion at my job.
I was so happy.
So when majority of my apartment went up in flames, I knew it was the devil trying to steal my joy.
I think I was in shock for the most part. I didn’t cry immediately.
I was in shock.

The following weeks were crazy.
The support and love from some people was amazing. It showed me the kinds of people I had in my corner.
Some were mad at me that they found out about the fire on social media and some were rallying around to support me.
Sleeping out of my house and trying to figure out how much I lost, I learned a lot in that time.
I truly thought I lost everything but something that truly stuck with me was the value in the people I loved.
They stayed close.
So in 2017, I plan to be a better friend and partner in 2017 to those that truly deserve it.


Over the year, I battled.
Trying so hard to hold on to things. Picture walking into the groceries store and only needing one item but you stretch out your arms and fill them up with things you realize that you need.
But what happens now is that you’re carrying a lot, too much sometimes.

How I was in 2016 was like when you get home from the grocery store and you want to only make one trip from the car to the house.
So you are carrying twenty bags like your life depends on it. Your hands are hurting but you gotta only make one trip!
And then you end up in the house and realize you forgot one bag in the trunk! That one bag can be that really good friend that you ignored or forgot about this year.
I have a couple of those.

but this was also the year I said “Fuck Your Friendship” and meant it.
It was the year I got tired of glorified interactions. People you only interact with on a surface level that you give undeserving titles, like friends.

It was the year I realized that some people claim to be your friends off past experience.
And not merit.
Respect is earned, given and maintained.
The people that care about you. Shouldn’t have to tell you everyday, but you shouldn’t doubt that they do either.
It was an eye opening year in that regard.
Be wary of friends that only want to talk to you about life when they hear “bad” things about you.
“Oh, I heard this today and I just wanted to come and talk to you first, because you know, you are my friend”
But the last time you spoke was 3weeks ago and it was because they heard something then too. Lol.
Now I’m not saying you have to be babied by your “friends” daily but you yourself, check yourself. If the only time you contacting someone is to talk about bad things, you might need to realign the kind of friend you are.
Friendships ended.
But if a friendship ends and the person is now out in the street dragging you at every chance they get, you have to tell yourself “Na me fuck up” for thinking you had sense to begin with.
There were some I literally said “fuck you” to, while knowing they were listening in.
Drop dead weight relationships or interactions. Sometimes we hold on to people because we are afraid of what our lives will look like without them but they are not even bringing anything to yours.
Don’t play yourself.
Only keep people that invest in you as often as you do them. No time for credit advance relationships.

What a blessing!
To have an outlet to create, explore and just share community with others.
I was/am/will be truly grateful for this year and the depths my show reached.
I bless God.
And I plan to work hard to bring better and bigger shows to those that love and support me.
Financial Responsibility

As I write this right now, my checking account is in negative $496.
I was out of work all of November and disability still aint come from post surgery.
So all my bills have hit, money long gone and savings vanished.
Nigeria on the horizon for many and I just dey here they pray.
I don’t say that for sympathy or whatever. Trust me, as much as I have many responsibilities as a first born, I was also financially irresponsible at certain times this year.
So I gotta do better for me and those relying on me.

You don’t realize who and what you are spending your hard earned money on, till the end of the road and you are looking back like what?!

2017, I need to save better and have more residual income.
So if it aint making money, cut ittttttt.


I let God down so much this year.
It’s insane.
“As much as it your responsibility to not bring shame to your family name, you shouldn’t bring reproach to God’s name.”

If someone insults God because of who you are, you are somewhat liable.
People are tired of reading the bible. They read you.
So when things go sour, they use you or your life to reflect God.

Someone called me a fake Christian this year. Mutilple times.
Essentially highlight that I displayed certain behaviors that would make God unhappy with me. And they were right.
So we have to be careful.
Even though some of the behaviors involved the person, it was still hugely damning to hear them say you are less of a child of God.
You can sin with an “unbeliever” but when they want to point the finger, you’re the one with a father to answer to.
Remember that.
I didn’t read my bible enough this year.
I was so distracted yo.
Focusing on people and pleasures that didn’t keep me filled.
And I gotta do better.
Starting today and through 2017, I will make a conscious effort to spend more alone time with God.

I was just telling my cousin how much Mr Eazi has allowed people to over use this word in 2016.

But you truly have to just enjoy vibes. Positive vibes.
Have people with positive energy around them.
You really gotta look at certain people from afar and watch the aura around them.

Even I brought on negative vibes in certain area of my life this year. And I had to check myself.
So surround yourself with positive and optimistic people that want to see you win at all costs.
People that will lift you up.
Do away with glorified “besties” and sometimes allow yourself to just be.
Here are some of the things I learned in 2016

1. It will be okay. As long as God sits on the throne, you will be fine.
2. Be thankful in all things.
3. Letting people go is just the beginning. You will not die
4. Love Yourself more than anything else. It radiates
5. You will make mistakes. Learn from them but learn more from others, so people don’t use you as a textbook.
6. Forgive yourself
7. Follow your passion. Discover your purpose.
8. Never settle for mediocrity.
9. Dare to be different. Like push the envelope
10. Demand the love and support you want and deserve.
11. Be accountable for your actions.
12. Your intent is not always enough. Your impact matters more.
13. believe in you and your heart. if you have a good heart, it will win. Eventually.
14. Save money
15. Travel and see the world
16. Allow yourself the space to be vulnerable.
17. Remember you are not an island but you are also strong enough to stand alone.
18. You cannot do anything without God.
#WhatTheHeckMan family, I adore you all. Thank you for being with me.
Thank you for allowing me to speak my truth and holding me up.
One thing I will ask each and everyone of you reading this is to hold me more accountable in 2017.
I am consumed by trying to be a better man. I want to be the best version of myself.
So if you catch me slipping, even if you don’t know me that well, please speak up.
I hope we all see the end of 2017 in divine joy, health, peace, happiness, prosperity and direction.
2017 will be great for you and me.
Say it into existence.
Thank you for being there for me.
I appreciate you. I bless God for you.

Till next time, ladies and gentlemen, it is the Wordsmith with the #WordsOfWednesday on WhatTheHeckMan.

Stay Up and Be Blessed.

Comment below and share with me, one thing you have learned in 2016 and one thing you will be better at in 2017.

Till next time, ladies and gentlemen, it is the Wordsmith with the #WordsOfWednesday on WhatTheHeckMan.

Stay Up and Be Blessed.

Follow @adewus4real

Thank you for reading and commenting. You are highly appreciated. 


© 2016 #WhatTheHeckMan

6 thoughts on “Réfléchir & Croître

  1. I truly appreciate your think pieces .. they are so real and brutally honest . They always spark an emotion , that causes a reaction that leads to action ( you see what I did there ).
    Thank you for sharing your deepest thoughts with us and I’m all here for #BeingMoreAccountable2017 . The other day I bookmarked the scripture Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 and I literally noted ” accountability”. I need it too , as I know I have also fallen short in many areas this year . Together we can all make it , because truly no man is an island .
    As you have titled this piece ” Growth ” , that’s the beauty in any pain we face . If you choose to , you grow and always come out better from it .
    Thanks again .

    P.s your poll I select all except ” more of the same ” 2017 more stories , more words of Wednesday , collaborations and books 😬

  2. It is funny how I read this at an orientation session for a college degree program I am taking yet again,I had been sitting here for a while feeling gloomy and down about doing something I am not ready for nor want to do.

    Decided to go through my unread emails as a way of distraction :D. I am glad I opened yours well like I always say is you have an amazing gift with written words and I say it everytime because it’s not everyone is blessed with such.

    Things that I will like to improve on in 2017 and yes I say things cause they are all linked-is be more proactive and intensify my relationship with God,I have a bad habit of procrastination but I intend to actively work on it as from this month.it has affected my growth in some very definitive areas of my life and also my relationship with God.

    Thank you for sharing with us another of your thoughts that lead to reflection,like the touch of French.je suis étudiante de français,En effet la croissance est nécessaire pour vivre dans cette jungle appelée vie.Je suis en train de m’exprimer couramment en français

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