#WordsofWednesday · Art · Fiction · Life · Poetry · Uncategorized

Insecure

Insecure

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People tell me I’m great

But I don’t see it

I’m told it’s about what’s in my heart

No on my face

But when I have no makeup on

It’s like people don’t want to relate

 

I try to hide the hurt

Glass after glass

When the emptiness hits

I fall flat

Praying for the pain to pass

Back to the beginning

I fear as my world stays spinning

Never giving me enough time to find

My true meaning

 

Body image issues

I don’t like this

Weight sways back and forth like handle bars

My pictures rack up likes

But I need another shortly after

Before the doubt within spikes

I question what people see in me

I never truly love the real me

And the feeling is similar between my homies

But we never talk about it

 

My heart has scars

It’s been torn apart

I attempt to mend it many times

But my environment drags me down

And somehow pierces again like darts

I should know my own self worth

I’ve been told what I mean to you and more

But here I am

Doubtful

Scared

Concerned

Stuck

In the same position and feeling out of luck

Running on fumes like a broken truck

The clock ticks

And I watch my growth come to a halt

 

 

So here I am

Broken

At the end of the road with no more to question myself

I have to push on

I promise to hold the reins and stand strong

Embrace and love myself once more

Truly at the end

I’m all I’ve got

So hug those stretch marks as they hug you

Keep snoring loudly

They don’t bother you

Love that extra pound of flesh

One more scoop of ice cream

It won’t kill you

Love you like it’s all you have

Love every scar

Every hurt

Every time you hit the dirt

Love all of you

And love it with every breath

You are truly beautiful

With or without that expensive dress

Lookout for my new series; this Saturday titled “The Abandoned One”

 

#WordsofWednesday 

Insecurities are normal. We all have them. They eat at you in many ways without you knowing how much they take away. The can halt you and cause you to fault yourself.

Proven and true.

But once you embrace them, you can turn them to strengths. The power they hold over you, you can harness and let it fuel you instead. My biggest insecurity is being left alone. Like the people I love the most leaving me. There have been situations where I have felt left behind.
Those situations have affected my relations(hips) lol. And caused me to always drive with the handbrake on.
I have lost people I love because I wasn’t able to be vulnerable enough.
And this all stemmed from not loving myself enough. It really sucks too.

This is a description of what some insecurities do:

You don’t love something about you or some part of you

Then you try to guard that part of you

The moment something makes you feel bad about that side of you

It automatically reinforces that you can never love that side of you anyways. Makes sense?

Body image issues, trust issues, loss issues, lack of self belief or worth. They are control and highlight insecurities within us.
Today I ask you to embrace those that you have and love yourself some more. Try harder today

Before you hurt yourself or hurt the people you really love.

If you can and want to, share one of the things that makes you feel insecure with me. Take ownership of it.

Stay Up!

PLEASE COMMENT.

The End

Follow @adewus4real

Thank you for reading and commenting. You are highly appreciated. 

Lookout for my new series; this Saturday called “The Abandoned One”

© 2014 #WhatTheHeckMan

9 thoughts on “Insecure

  1. funny how these insecurities stem from many little things….mine is as a result of neglect. quite similar to yours, my biggest insecurity is being unheard or unnoticed. I am quite possessive and I need to know that someone is listening, some days I have to bully my way to relevance, but I stay learning and growing and getting better….thank you for sharing parts of yourself with me!

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  2. Beautiful . The scariest thing about acknowledging and discussing your insecurities is the feeling of nakedness that comes with it . Nakedness in the sense you feel vulnerable and all the “scars” on your body exposed . Admitting and tackling your insecurities is such a brave thing to do and I’m sure this post will encourage people to tackle theirs .

    I would need a whole post on your blog for my list of insecurities lol . Some of them are the root to my anger issues , I get so defensive and quick to protect myself.

    A good support system has helped me overcome a lot of my insecurities . And it’s true what they say , the things you hate/ dislike about yourself is usually what your friends/ loved ones love most about you .

    Stay blessed x

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  3. Right on time as usual.

    I think one of my biggest insecurities/fears is not living up to the hype. Not being worthy. I’ve pushed away a lot of people and opportunities simply because of not feeling like I was worth the trouble. I think it stems from years of trying to be something/someone I’m not in order to be loved.

    Now that I have a clearer picture of who I am, it’s a real fear of mine that people won’t like it. A couple days ago on Twitter I asked what the biggest lesson was that people had learned this year, and my own answer was that you can’t force people to see you/your vision as you do. I’ve really come a long way in overcoming this fear because I’ve learned that I’m not meant to get along with everyone. Everyone isn’t going to look at me and see the freaking amazing person I am, and that’s okay. It doesn’t take away from the fact that I’m amazing. Woke up lih dis. *Yoncé shoulder bounce* Flawless.

    Now, I still have days where that doubt and fear creep back in, but I’m not afraid to be myself. Cuz the alternative is just too difficult to go back to.

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  4. My greatest insecurity is my fear of not being good enough. I’ve had my share of bad friends who didn’t appreciate my kindness and cutting those people off did a lot to remind me that I’m cool as cool gets and that’s their loss. They’re the ones not fucking good enough. In any case, when my insecurities try to creep back in, words of kindness and appreciation from my family and friends (even tho they scare me sometimes because of all the faith they put in me.) always remind me that I matter. I’m one piece in the engine that’s needed to keep it running.

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  5. Great post. Something to think about and reflect on. This current society has laid down ground rules that makes it nearly impossible not to have insecurities. We can only hope our insecurities don’t overcome us.

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  6. Truly appreciate you and your readers being bold enough to share your insecurities with me. As I lie down and reflect on the things that I am most insecure about, I am made aware that we are all very much in the same struggles, with different faces. And that lessens the load just a bit. So ladies and lads, every time you feel overwhelmed, don’t forget to breathe. Because you are not alone in your fears and you have what it takes to overcome whatever it is-heck your just might be the tool shaping you for your destiny because after all you have to pass the test in order to have the testimony 🙂 chin up dolls.

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