So, I had my housewarming this past weekend. A full house, lots of food, great vibes, and some of the people I love most in the world all in one place.

Honestly, I feel like the only other time I’ll get every single person—or at least most of the people I love—in the same room is probably at my wedding or a big birthday party. A 40th or 50th, something like that. 😂

But it was such a fun weekend. There’s something about having the people you care about in one place, being able to connect, laugh, talk about whatever, play games, and just enjoy each other’s company. It was a reminder of how much I value those moments.

And some of you might not realize this, but I had been panicking in the days leading up to the party because I was worried there wouldn’t be enough food.

A couple of people had asked to bring additional guests, and I started doing the math in my head. I had ordered food for a certain number of people, added a little extra for good measure, and somehow the guest list had grown by more than 10 people beyond what I had originally planned for.

Y’all, I was STRESSED. 😂

But everything worked out. The games were fun, the food went around, and by the time everyone had left closer to midnight, I was sitting there feeling an overwhelming sense of gratitude.

A few things really stood out to me.

Love Has Met Me Everywhere I’ve Turned

From my count, I had people from my immediate neighborhood, friends I’ve made at the gym, family, friends from church, and people I originally connected with on social media who have since become real-life friends and family.

At the very minimum, I had people from five different walks of life all in the same room.

And nothing beats that.

Nothing beats looking around and realizing that love has met you everywhere you’ve turned.

I moved to Austin two and a half years ago. Some of these people I knew before I moved here, while others have become part of my life along the way. But to have so many people from different pockets of my life, all significant and important to me in their own ways, gathered under one roof? That truly, truly felt like a blessing.

Sometimes we get so caught up in the process of building a life that we forget to stop and look at the life we’ve already built.

This weekend gave me a chance to do that.

A Little Sign From God?

Now, there’s something I don’t always like to read too much into, but I can’t help acknowledging the coincidence.

Over the course of the evening, three different people quietly told me they were expecting either their first child or their next child.

And that warmed my heart.

First, because they thought enough of me to share that news with me. I don’t take that lightly.

But second, because there was something particularly comforting about hearing that while celebrating what can sometimes feel like an empty house.

It’s a big house, and it’s just me in it right now.

And in the middle of all that, I had three people sharing news about the families they were growing.

I couldn’t help but feel like God was gently reminding me, Don’t worry. I will fill this house.

And maybe it will be this house. Maybe it will be the next one. I don’t know what that looks like yet.

But I am grateful for the opportunity to be part of the village these people are building, just as I am grateful to have them as part of mine.

There’s something beautiful about being able to celebrate what God is doing in other people’s lives while trusting Him with your own story, too.

The Village Was Villaging

Another thing I loved was watching people from all these different parts of my life interact.

People who might never have met each other otherwise were laughing, playing games, having conversations, and just being themselves. Everyone seemed comfortable. Everyone was having a good time.

And that was refreshing to see.

I think sometimes we underestimate how much it means to create a space where people can show up as themselves, connect with others, and leave feeling a little more connected than when they arrived.

That was one of the things I wanted for this house.

Not just a beautiful space. Not just somewhere to entertain people. But a home where people could come together, enjoy themselves, and feel like they belonged.

And I think we got that right.

I still need to grab the footage from my DJI and edit it. So there’s more content to come. Head to my Instagram to see more.
😂 https://www.instagram.com/adewus4real/

A Lesson in Gratitude (Because You Know I’m Going to Leave You With One)

Of course, there were a few lessons to take away from the weekend.

One thing that stood out to me was how seriously I take the people I consider friends, or the people I invite into my life and my space.

There were people who RSVP’d and didn’t show up. Some didn’t let me know they weren’t coming, either.

And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t take some of that personally.

At one point, I found myself thinking about the people who weren’t there. The people who didn’t show up, who didn’t communicate, or who, for whatever reason, weren’t able to be part of the day.

But then I looked around.

There were almost 40 people who had come through that house over the course of the evening.

FORTY PEOPLE.

And I was sitting there thinking about the handful of people that weren’t there?

Sometimes, we really have to catch ourselves.

Because that is exactly how we go through life. We spend so much time fixating on what we don’t have, what didn’t happen, who didn’t show up, or who didn’t come through for us that we fail to appreciate what is directly in front of us.

And I need us to move away from that.

I had friends who showed up right at 4 p.m., exactly when the party was supposed to start. I had friends who stayed behind to help me organize, wash dishes, and put things back in place. I had people who bought things off my home registry. People who brought food, brought dessert, gave their time to help me set up and take down, and took an interest in my home.

People walked around, loved the space, and celebrated this milestone with me.

People checked on me afterward. They sent pictures and videos. They made sure I knew they had a good time.

There was so much love in that house.

There was so much love in that house, just as there was enough rice for everybody to take home. 😂

And as I continue to grow and mature within myself, I want to get better at appreciating what God has placed directly in front of me without constantly looking over my shoulder at what might be missing.

That doesn’t mean I won’t feel disappointed when people don’t show up for me. I’m human, and relationships matter to me. But I don’t want the absence of a few people to overshadow the presence of so many who showed up with love.

I want to learn to let the love that is present be enough to appreciate in its own right.

The Home I Always Dreamed Of

Another thing I felt was relief.

This housewarming had been weighing on my mind for a while. Ever since I moved in, people had been asking me when I was going to host it. I knew I wanted to do it, and I wanted people to have a good time, but planning and hosting an event takes work.

So finally getting it done, seeing people enjoy themselves, and hearing afterward that they had a great time felt really rewarding.

At one point, my friends started teasing me because I was practically forcing people to take food home with them.

I was handing out trays and bowls like I was running a restaurant.

I think all my Tupperware is gone at this point. 😂

People were telling me, “I don’t have to cook for the next two days!”

And I was like, EXACTLY.

That was the vision!

When I was growing up and imagined becoming a homeowner, when I pictured myself having a space of my own and hosting the people I loved, that was exactly what I imagined.

People would come over. They would feel at home. They would eat, be merry, laugh, connect, and leave fulfilled.

Not just with full stomachs, but with full hearts, too.

And to see that vision become a reality is something I will never take for granted.

I thank God for the gift of being able to provide that experience for the people I love. I don’t take it lightly that I have a home where I can open the doors, gather my community, and create memories like this.

And I look forward to more.

Maybe we’ll have a few more celebrations in the near future. Who knows? 👀

But for now, my heart is full.

My belly is full.

My refrigerator is full.

And apparently, my Tupperware collection needs rebuilding.

I’m just very, very thankful.

Until Next Time

To my community, my friends, and my family: thank you for showing up and showing out. Thank you for the love, the generosity, the food, the laughter, the conversations, the help, and the memories.

I don’t take any of it for granted.

And just as I’m grateful to have you as part of my story, I look forward to continuing to be part of yours. I want to celebrate your milestones, show up for your big moments, and watch you grow and evolve, just as I hope you’ll continue to do for me.

Here’s to building our village in Austin and beyond. Here’s to having more reasons to celebrate one another. And here’s to learning to appreciate the love that is already right in front of us.

My house may have been the setting this weekend, but the real gift was the people in it.

Until next time, you know how we do it.

Stay up. ❤️

I was enjoying Akintayo Akiwande’s Praise Medley 4 on my way to church this bright Sunday morning.
I absolutely love this medley. It’s such a beautiful arrangement of music, and a wonderful way to worship and glorify God.
If you doubt me, hit play and see it.

But while I was enjoying the music, I was also painfully aware that I was running late. I knew that by the time I parked across the street and walked into church, I would probably be five to seven minutes late.

And I was beating myself up about it because I really did not want to be late. In my mind, I had done everything possible, or at least everything within my power, to make sure I got there on time.

I had picked out my outfit the day before. I was going with a blue ensemble, complete with a tie, pocket square, and lapel pin. I had also picked out these really nice shoes.
They weren’t entirely brown, more of a maroon, chocolatey, wine-colored brown. Whatever the proper name for that color is, they were cute.

And yet, here I was, still going to pull up to church late.

At one point, I tried to console myself. Look, I tried. I really tried. I tried to leave early and get there on time.

But then I asked myself a more uncomfortable question.

Did I really do everything within my power to be there on time?

The honest answer was no.

What I realized was that, even though I had picked out my outfit the night before, I hadn’t actually picked out every detail. That morning, I still had four pocket square options I was trying to decide between because I hadn’t settled on a tie. Once I finally picked a tie, I had to find the pocket square holder, which took a few more minutes. Then I picked up my pants and realized they were wrinkled, with a double crease running down the back, so I had to iron them.

All in all, I could identify six or seven little things I did that morning that, collectively, accounted for those five to seven minutes.

And somewhere along the drive to church, the Holy Spirit began to minister to me about something much bigger than being late.

Intent versus impact.

The headline was simple: I was supposed to walk into church at 10:30 a.m. Instead, I walked in at 10:36.

Six minutes late.

Everything that happened before 10:36, every explanation I could offer, every little thing that delayed me, did not change that outcome. My intention was to be there by 10:30, but the impact was that I wasn’t.

Now, could I have done things differently to arrive on time? Absolutely.

I could have chosen my entire outfit the night before, including the tie, pocket square, and every other detail. I could have ironed everything and laid it all out so that the morning required as little decision-making as possible.

And there’s another thing I could have done. I typically love recording a fit check on Sunday mornings, or whenever I’m leaving the house dressed up. But could I have recorded that video on Saturday instead?

I’ve done that before, and when I do, I feel so much lighter. There’s less pressure and less rushing around trying to deliver on something in the very moment I’m supposed to be getting out of the door.

So the question I keep coming back to is this: What stops us from doing that little bit of extra work that makes the difference?

I continue to believe that so much of the greatness we’re searching for is rooted in that extra step. That additional preparation. That willingness to do the work ahead of time so that our intentions and our impact are more likely to align.

And I think a lot of us make excuses for not doing it.

I certainly tried to that morning. I wanted to tell myself that I had tried my best, that I had put my clothes together, and that I had made an effort.

And to be fair, it was an improvement. There have been Sundays when I’ve arrived at 10:49 or 10:50, essentially missing all of praise and worship. There have also been Sundays when I’ve been significantly more punctual because I woke up on time and planned my morning properly. I’ve even showered during the first half of a Premier League game so I could make sure I got to church on time.

The point is, I’ve experienced both sides of it. I’ve seen what happens when I prepare, and I’ve seen what happens when I don’t.

And I’m responsible for both.

You are responsible for the outcome you repeatedly create, even when you have a perfectly reasonable explanation for how you got there.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve started to realize that the difference between being good and pursuing greatness often lives in the details. It’s in the preparation nobody sees, the extra step nobody asks you to take, and the discipline to do something ahead of time rather than relying on yourself to figure it out in the moment.

It’s in understanding that you have to take ownership of the impact, not just defend your intent.

My intent was to be at church by 10:30. But when I honestly examined my morning, I realized that I hadn’t done everything within my power to make that happen.

And that realization matters because this lesson extends far beyond being late to church.

It shows up in our relationships, when we say we care about someone but repeatedly fail to show up for them. It shows up at work, when we intend to deliver something excellent but don’t give ourselves enough time to do it well. It shows up in our personal goals, when we say we want to change but don’t build the habits and systems that make change possible.

We can have the best intentions in the world. But intentions alone don’t erase the impact of our actions.

Now, of course, there are things outside our control. You can prepare the night before, wake up early, leave with enough time to spare, and still encounter unexpected traffic. That’s life. Sometimes, despite doing everything right, things won’t go according to plan.

But that should be the exception, not the norm.

And I think that’s the shift in mentality many of us need to make: moving from a place of constantly explaining what happened to taking responsibility for the things we could have done differently.

Not beating ourselves up. Not pretending that circumstances don’t matter. And certainly not demanding perfection from ourselves.

Just being honest enough to recognize where we fell short, take responsibility for it, and do something differently next time.

Because if you want to be received a certain way, you have to take responsibility for showing up that way. You cannot continually rely on what you intended to do while ignoring the experience other people actually have of you.

So, as you go about your week, take a little time to examine the stories you tell yourself.
The explanations that make you feel better about an outcome you know you could have influenced.
The moments when you say you tried your best without honestly examining whether you did everything you reasonably could.

Sometimes, the difference between where you are and where you want to be isn’t some extraordinary breakthrough. Sometimes, it’s the extra ten minutes you spent preparing the night before.

Until next time, stay strapped in.