Keep The Quiet Out by JP Cooper
People all over the house
Friends and family from far and near
People constantly coming to check on me, I hated it all.
If you have ever been to a Nigerian event, funeral or otherwise, the people have a way of turning everything to a party.
Even if the death happened in the worst way, like a ghastly car accident, the people would still come out in their traditional regalia and look to dance and drink.
I hate funerals.
I always have but I particularly hated this one.
Not just because it was for my mother but for the fact that I could not decline to attend.
Before this one, I would always find an excuse to be excused from attending any funeral ceremonies.
In the hot summer sun, we stood there.
One of my cousins had done my makeup and the sun was trying to remind me of the ugly that hid beneath the MAC solution I had on my face.
The local Anglican church’s priest did his thing. Then the traditional father did his thing for a while and then the speeches. Oh the speeches!
Everyone had something to say.
Thinking back to that day now truth be told, I was extremely irritated.
I had just had my whole world crushed but I had to fake being strong in front of all these people.
And people kept touching me!
More than losing my mother, I hated being the center of the attention.
I hated hundred sweaty, food greased palms, rubbing my shoulder, touching my face, telling me to be strong.
I paid my respects and went into the car. That night, something else changed in my life. Nobody died or maybe it was better if someone had..
Tolani and I were in conversation the night of the funeral at the palace. We just lay there next to each other and talked about different things.
It was helping.
Before I watched the coffin go into the ground, it really hadn’t been real to me. That night, I laid there fighting the reality that had beset me.
Things were changing.
Tolani was yapping on about some guy. Well not just any guy; Dele.
“You should have seen the way he was looking at you tho. Like he just wanted to undress you at that cemetery”
I turned my head to the right and looked at her with a smile on my face as I said
“Tola, how would you have seen his eyes? Everyone was wearing sun glasses o”
She scoffed and said
“Don’t you know men?
When they want you they have those piercing Cyclops eyes. When he gives you that look ehn, things just unlock in places all over your body.
Stop acting like you don’t know jare”
She was right but I was going to try to play it off till I was sure what Dele wanted. Or better yet, what I wanted.
“Me, I don’t know sha. It just seems like you want me and him together so bad, you will forget I have other things to worry about”
She checked back into reality and said
“Oh yeah, so what are you going to do now when you get back to Lagos?”
I didn’t want to talk about it.
I didn’t want to address the uncertainty.
I didn’t want to know just yet.
We had known about my mother’s condition but I never expected death. She was being treated by some of the best doctors in the country. My mother had suffered from Long QT syndrome an inherited heart rhythm disorder that can cause fast, chaotic heartbeats. The rapid heartbeats caused her heart to stop that day as she exercised.
I just wanted to stay in that moment and not return to Lagos. Return to an empty house, to not receiving calls from her on my phone. To being alone.
I got off the bed and Tolani said
“Where are you going?”
I was lying. I just needed to get out of the room.
As I stepped into the hallway, I thought about my dad and how he was holding up.
I turned and headed for his room.
When I arrived outside his door, the things I heard, took me back a bit.
I was shocked.
There were sounds coming from his room.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
“Sayo, you need to remarry”
I could hear my father’s older sister saying to him.
And then he continued
“Why do I need to remarry?
I already have Bola and we have all we need. Besides, my wife just passed.
Can we show some respect?”
She laughed and said
“You don’t understand, this family does not want you.
They will never love you like their daughter. And more than anything, they will be coming for Bola now.
I heard rumblings that the King is hoping to marry Bola off early, so if she delivers a boy, he can rule.”
My dad’s voice became raised
“They cannot do that and anyone who comes for my daughter has to go through me first.
Bola will not be married off. She is only 18.
She still has a full life ahead of her.
They both went silent for a minute. And then my aunt broke the silence by saying
“Protect yourself. Remarry.
Get yourself a son and begin to detach from this family. Royal families can be dangerous. Remember, your wife had many brothers after her who will be vying for the throne.
Do not be a discarded accessory due to stubbornness.
I have said my piece”
She got up and the door opened up. She looked surprised as she saw me standing there. She looked at me and said
“Ah Bola, how are you?
You’re not sleeping?”
I shook my head and faked a smile as I said
“No ma, I couldn’t sleep.”
She looked at me as she tried to figure out how long I might have been standing there for. She said no more as she walked away.
I had her marked.
The next morning before we all began to return to our various destinations, my grandfather; the King, called a meeting.
We all sat there in his chambers.
He said very little but towards the end of the meeting the talk about his heir came to focus.
“We all know that Arewa was the first born and she led by example. While our culture and our tradition does not physically put women on the throne, they are gods in our eyes as they mold worthy leaders for us.
Now Arewa did not leave a son and I am still able and vibrant enough to live for a few more years by the grace of gods of the land.
Maybe by the time the gods are ready for me to pass on, Bola would have delivered twin boys”
Uncomfortable giggles and laughs filled the room as everyone in the room turned and looked at me.
He had a huge smile on his face as he said those words and it was clear he was joking but with that, he painted a huge target on my back.
Four years on and I was trying to forget that entire year.
I don’t think I had fully recovered from losing my mom and having to move from my dad but I was doing okay.
Dele and I had finally found our groove. It had taken a few years before we officially started dating but so far, it had been good.
He was patient with me, even though I would occasionally drift into my moods and forget things or become cold.
In the aftermath of my mother’s death, a lot happened.
A lot changed but Dele was present.
He was dead silent the whole ride home. I couldn’t figure out why.
I was trying to stay awake and not fall asleep as we he drove. I reclined the seat as I tried to not fall asleep. He still said nothing.
I had too much to drink and while he was trying to stop me at the club from downing another glass. I snapped. I took out a whole week’s worth of anger out on him. He looked caught out and embarrassed by my tipsy outburst. Most of my friends present were close to us and knew it was the alcohol but there was something about being proper in public that he liked. His parents raised him that way and even though he tried to relax more in public, he really couldn’t help it sometimes.
My eye lids continued to feel heavy and I finally gave in to sleep. I must have been out for just a few minutes before we arrived. The car stopped and I slowly sat up.
He just sat there and didn’t say anything again. I was so sleepy. I sat back down and closed my eyes again.
About 30 minutes later, I heard my phone ringing.
I reached for it between my legs as I scanned the name on the phone. It was Dele but why was he calling me. I looked over to the driver’s side and he wasn’t sitting there. I answered and he told me to come inside to a room 2508.
I was confused.
I sat up and looked outside the window, we were at a hotel. I picked up my shoes and scanned the car. When the text came in. I looked down at my phone.
It said “don’t worry. I packed all your stuff”
The walk into the hotel felt like the longest ever but I finally made it in. Following the directions I made it to the room.
The door was slightly ajar and I could hear some music but I wasn’t sure. I think it was Sade.
I pushed the door open into a candle lit room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed.
I closed the door behind me as I walked timidly towards him. There were roses on the bed. Candles everywhere. I was sure that I was missing something. He stretched out his hand as I dropped my shoes, purse and phone on the floor.
He looked deeply into my eyes. Reaching for a glass of water on the table. He handed it to me and said “drink this”.
Like a kid scared of their parent while downing Pepto Bismol, I drained the glass. I placed it on the table and was about to turn around when he got up and stood right behind me. He whispered in my ears
“Don’t turn around”
I could feel the heat from his mouth on my neck as the bass in his voice vibrated through my ears. I stood frozen in place and then I heard the silver clink as he cuffed me.
It happened so fast that I couldn’t stop him. He walked me backwards slowly and dropped me on to the bed.
I could feel the cold rose petals all over my back.
I was looking up to him as he began to take off his shirt. He looked determined.
Sliding my dress up, he pulled my panties down.
I tried to negotiate my release because I knew what being handcuffed meant. This was his way of “punishing” me for my behavior earlier.
He was going to suck and nibble so hard on my clit that my legs would shake uncontrollably with pleasure.
First lick as his tongue greeted my full lips.
He had that effect on me. I could not begin to understand why I was that wet. I tried to stay calm as my moans began to escape from my mouth. It was so hard.
His tongue was so strong but so caring to my lips. They meshed so well.
Parting and dipping inside me, his tongue was at home.
There was this thing he would do where he would blow a bubble of air in his mouth and isolate his tongue on my clit. In the most unpredictable patterns, he would run his tongue all over my clit that was now throbbing. I was moaning so loud as I kicked and screamed trying to break free but I knew I was not leaving his grip. And definitely not breaking out of the cuff.
At one point, he had my legs up in the air as he stuck his tongue in and out of me.
I caught glimpses of his perfectly trimmed beard soaked in my wetness.
Thinking about it now is getting me wet again. Sorry let me continue.
So my legs are shaking mid air while his strong arms pin me down. Sade’s soothing voice is in total contrast to the events in the bed.
He then stops. And pulls him out. I called him “Bossman”
Like a center in the paint, he was guaranteed to score when he went that hard.
As he slid into me I begged that he take the cuff off me, he had this evil smile on his face.
He thrusts sent the message. “Don’t fuck with me”
I was begging. Apologizing however I knew best but nothing was working. Nothing at all.
I could feel him in the space between my belly button and my now consumed pink.
He began to kiss my neck as he slid in and out and I lost it.
My eyes began to roll back into my head.
I could feel myself leave my body and take a seat on the chair as I watched him ravage me.
I tried to keep my voice down but it was a huge fail. I was so loud.
I could feel myself nearing my climax.
“Baby, I’m going to cum. Pleaseeeeee”
I begged but he just went harder, I think he knew exactly when it was going to happen as I went silent. You know when you’re about to let it all out and you hold all your breath in and your mouth is wide open like you just got slapped on your bareback as a kid. Like tears without sound or the drops.
Yeah! Just like that.
And then he did the most shocking thing.
He pulled out!
He fucking pulled out!
I opened my eyes and looked at him in shock like wtf!
“Did you cum?”
He smiled and then he went back down. My eyes grew big. He was going to push me over the cliff with his tongue.
I tried to clamp my legs together to prevent him from doing it. He pried them open with his powerful arms.
And then his breath, hot as fire at that moment. He placed his tongue on my clit. With his two front teeth, he nibbled and sucked. I swear I was going crazy.
I squeezed my legs together. Like you just did too.
Yeah just like that.
I tried to trap what I knew was going to come next and then, it happened. I let it all go!
The sound was sharp like enough to shatter glass.
I was gasping for air as he let me go.
Still handcuffed and on my back, I immediately felt sleepy. He smiled and came to my head and kissed me on the forehead. And then all I remember was staring at his ass that I usually joked was bigger than mine as he walked out the room.
The bathroom light went on and the lights in my head went out.
I passed out.
I felt him come back later and my hands became free.
My sleep was so peaceful. I opened my eyes as the sun hit my side of the bed.
As I began wake, I looked at my wrists which were sore from my battling the night before. I looked at my left wrist which had the hand cuffs dangling from it. Everything started to come back to me. I turned around and looked at him fast asleep next to me.
I was going to use the bathroom when I noticed a box by my bed side, it said
“Happy Anniversary My Queen”
That was what he whispered to me as he uncuffed me the night before and why he was mad at the club because I was getting too drunk to appreciate all he had planned out for me. I smiled so hard and was immediately consumed with sadness for forgetting my own anniversary. It had only been two years. Sigh.
I got off the bed and headed to the bathroom, I opened the door and noticed blown out candles and a full bath with bubbles. Scented massage oils and such. I felt horrible.
Next to the tub was a card that read
“Thank you baby for always thinking of me even when I’m not doing it myself. You are everything and more. I love you”
I looked myself in the mirror. Award for the “worst” girlfriend of the year goes to….
I walked back into the room and grabbed my phone, I was about to start planning to save face with something extravagant.
I got a text message from Tolani that read
“Babes, call me ASAP”
I hit the dial button and a few rings later, my best friends voice flooded my ears.
“Tolani, I was about to call you self! Guess what, I forgot about my anniversary yesterday.
Like Dele had this elaborate thing planned out and I forgot about it.
What can I do?
I need to do something big to make it up…. Like I drank so much and I passed out before I could even take it all in”
She laughed and said
“Wait! So you didn’t take prick?”
I scoffed and I said
“Nooooo…. I’m still sore as we speak. He definitely put it on me.”
Tolani laughed and said
“So babes, I called you because guess what I just heard?”
“Your dad is getting remarried. My friend just saw him at the mall with a woman ring shopping”
I felt it.
I was surprised.
Even though it had been four years, I was selfish.
Why would he try to replace her?
I wanted to be angry but did I have a right to?
Wasn’t I being selfish?
The man had waited for four years but was that enough?
I could feel my heart splitting.
I sat down on the toilet seat and tears began to flow down my eyes.
And I didn’t even know why.
Thank you for reading and commenting. You are highly appreciated.
Lookout for Part 3 of Pains next week.
© 2015 #WhatTheHeckMan