The End

The End

Waves by Mr Probz

I don’t want you to come close

I don’t even want you to talk

Because you’ll captivate me

Slowly find your way and start to consume me

My thoughts and dreams

Become one with you

My fears you’ll wash away like by a stream

With yours tongue white like a new sponge

I don’t want to fall for you

Because I know how this ends

So here

Take this bargain

Let’s just stay friends

……

Months have passed

Seasons have changed

Blocks are built

I have come of age

You’re still here

and now we talk everyday

Somehow in you

I now find inspiration in a new way

The future I see in you like a crystal ball

With you by my side

I manage to stand tall

With you

I found love

……

Somehow behind my dark skin I blush

The words that come from you

They lift me up

Being with you

Leaves me wanting more

Less of me

You and more

The way you look at me

You search my soul

The deepest of you

I really want to know

I’m in love with you now

That I know

How

I wish I knew

Just hold me close

And promise you’ll stay true

……

It’s now harder to get you talk

When you wanted me

All avenues of mine

You used to stalk

The growth has stopped

The love is there

But it’s not coming through anymore

More and more

I see you’re not here

I know where you are

But I feel so alone like in the start

……

You broke my heart

You scarred and tore me apart

Now I’m definitely back to the start

And I’m comparing the next person to you

Trying to build the next model like you

But it was you

That gave me tears

Made me cry and broke me in two

I don’t even know what is true

I ask myself

Who are you

And I question what is love

……

Your words used to adorn me

Now they annoy

I can’t imagine I fell for you

My insecurities I have to you

Pieces of me are littered around your home

But my throbs alone

Yet I am still drawn to you

I’m crying to him about you

As he smoothes my hair

I can feel myself feeling safe here

But I know exactly how this ends

I’m crying here because I was just here

Falling in love is the easiest part of an interaction/relationship. It can be with a job, work, school anything. In someone that understands and completes you, you slowly find yourself drifting away. You get lost in them and begin to align your dreams and goals.

There is a fear there though. Tangible and very real, people close that door because they do not want to experience what it feels to be heart broken.

Breakups are hard. For the most part and if you truly loved the person, it can be a rough time.

You question God, yourself, your choices. Self worth and self hate become a conversation. I’m here to tell you that it’s not always you.

My friend told me that

“no matter how much love you have, if you plant it in the wrong soil, it won’t grow. No matter what you do”

Point there is, no matter how great you are, if the person isn’t the right one for you or they are not ready, you will never feel like you’re enough.

Bad breakups or hurtful break ups like cheating, abuse or eating plantain when you weren’t supposed to can cause a lot of self blaming.

I just want you to know that

“The worst thing that can you do is to give up on you because of somebody else.” -B

Dust yourself off and get up. You are beautiful, you are strong. You are unique and heck, you are part of the #WhatTheHeckMan crew!

Some of you are out there in abusive, stagnant or non existent situations or relationships. If you know you deserve more, ask for it. If you don’t get it, then leave.

Break ups don’t have to only be for relationships. Sometimes you need to leave a friendship, job, environment. Self evaluate tonight and find where you need to make a change and do it soon. Before it gets worse.

Above all though, pray over everything.

Till next time.

Stay Up!

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The End

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